I started with PowerPPC back in the '90s (it did not even ship with a working X system). Then went to Debian a few years later, and it was great. I played around with Gentoo for a little while when it first came out, then ended up back on Debian after a couple months. Then I played around with Arch for a little when it showed up, then went back to Debian. After that I just said fuck it, and have stuck with Debian. I run testing/unstable unless it’s some side server I have, in that case I just run stable. I hear good things about OpenSUSE and Fedora, but at this point I’m old and don’t feel like trying something when I have no issues. Tiling WM and Vim. That’s about all I seem to need.
Even though we have the gun nuts all over this fucked up country, we do manage to far outscore the UK on per capita knife crime as well. Yay us. I agree with your take on the motivation for the article.